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You can reset the device back to factory setting by holding the power button for 15-30 seconds. CAUTION it will clear away your address book and any custom set ups you have done. You also might contact your cell phone provider
Only the originator can get into the program. Just demand that your daughter write down the password for you. If you are concerned that she is being secretive of her activity and she is not cooperating with your wishes, take her computer privileges away until she comes around. Disconnect the Internet from her computer or if it is a wireless system, change your wireless password.