My Yahoo screen name is "iknowapple", feel free to IM me to test your video.
There is one very simple answer to the Mac to PC problem, get Windows for your Mac with VMware. (Parallels does not support iSight.)
What program are you using to video chat with the PC? I haven't seen any problems using Yahoo between Mac's and PC's. If you are using Yahoo and you're having problems, check your Yahoo video settings.
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Might be using too much video ram and cannot handle all the extra video input or it could be a bandwidth issue.
Try closing down all windows and just have video chat open or try clearing web browser history.
First go the system preferences and then sound and then click on the input and ensure that the built-in microphone is selected and check the volume is set to whatever you need.
In google chat go to options and then down to chat settings. You can then go to microphone under Voice and video chat and under microphone select either default device or built-in microphone. You can then verify your settings.
This can come from your friends low internet connexion router or firewall. This can also come from your side (check your modem for security options that would block incoming or outgoing video signal).
If you use ichat you can try to disable your firewall if it is on...
just checking, but did you use ichat? ichat is the chat client for AIM on a mac. they show icons next to the people that you can audio or video chat with. it shows a video camera next to those who you can mutually video chat with. if you click the icon, it makes a video chat. if you were looking to use a service other than AIM, i suggest meebo.com. you just hit the webcam icon once chatting with someone and you are ready to go (assuming you have the isight webcam in your macbook).
hope this helps ;-)
You will not be able to accept or decline until someone try to initiate a connection with you. You are getting the declined message from whomever you were trying to connect to. That just means, the had an option to accept or decline allowing you to view them, and they may have declined. Try it out with someone who is currently using the feature. Once you know they have accepted your request. It should give you an option ot accept (or delcine) theirs.
Hope this helps....
Let me know...
If you are using VMware Fusion at the same time that you get the problem then it is Fusion. Check by shutting down Fusion then trying the iChat. If it works fine then it's definitely Fusion that is interrupting it.
With internet sharing off as you describe the next thing is to make sure that it is also not sharing the iSight itself. When fusion is running but not windows itself, check the configuration of your windows bootable in Fusion. (You'll have to excuss me a bit as I havn't used Fusion for a bit since switching over to Parallels) Check to see if the iSight is listed among the USB devices.
If it's not there load up windows and check which devices are connected there from the main Fusion Menu or the little icons on the Fusion Status bar. If it's not, double check by right clicking on MyComputer and choosing properties then go to Device Manager and then looking in there for any USB camera devices. If it is, right click and disable it.