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I have the same problem it has happened before and it then worked just fine after, but now no matter what i tried such as re installing the headset i can not hear anybody in my xbox live party or myself, I tried recording a voice message to try and hear myself but nothing. I can however hear the game and can talk. I just can't hear any myself or anybody talking to me.
Dan, You should be able to hear yourself inside your head as the small hairs that vibrate in fluid in your ear canal will pick up your vocalizations. In any case you know what you're saying and it shouldn't be a problem talking to someone. Now if you're listening to music really loud on those headphones and still need to hear yourself think, I suggest you turn down the volume. :)
Shut down the software where you can see yourelf before running the video talk - They should now be able to see you as long as your camera is broadcasting - to check this in your video talk sofware under settings/ tools/ video/