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Usually, this is due to your friends inviting you then they enter a game so you can't join their lobby. Try talking to your friend at the same time and make sure they dont enter a game so you can get to their lobby once they've invited you.
try putting your xbox on the dmz in your routers settings. find your xbox's ip address and insert it into the dmz which leaves ALL security open but since no one can hack a 360 you don't have any worries, it worked for me! good luck
Yhe only thing noticable here, is that the 360 elite has the 60 gig hard-drive instead of the Standard 20 gig, as fitted with the white 360. perhaps you might be able to try a 20 gig hard-drive on the box. May work, worth a shot. i,d also check microsofts site, for any game updates or patches for the game itself.
hope this helps ya buddy.
p.s plenty of people would be willing to trade your elite for a standard white 360. this would be another alternative.
Is your Internet connection able to Reach to the Xbox 360?? If it is then you probably have to try asking a friend to join your game to see if it works. If it doesn't work then try moving the Xbox 360 closer to your Wireless Connection. O Btw... People dont always join your games.